your darkest thoughts.

There are days when you find yourself at your lowest. A recluse in your condo and a prisoner of your sweatpants. These days are the struggle. You don’t know if you’re okay or why you feel so hollow. Your eyes don’t say anything but pain and confusion. These days question everything that once was, as the things that use to make your world turn, don’t anymore. Your darkest thoughts start to make sense and you spend your time, just getting by. Yet, on the days you can’t even force a smile, are the days you still feel purpose. It’s not that you don’t want to live. It’s that you’ve forgotten how.

the madness in your head.

tumblr_m4siurMKSo1qc7urro1_500We’re scared of the people who are going to let us down, kill our dreams and cause us pain. We’re scared of real emotions. The weight of heartache and the misery we must tolerate when we can no longer find sense. We runaway from pain and we cheat ourselves from life.

This proves we know so little. We’re cowards hoping to numb rejection. Hoping to endure no more then the sting of a paper cut. There are amazingly painful emotions we must learn to survive. We need to get out of our own way, out of our own mind and see that we’re not alone. We’re surrounded by people who bleed red, whose hands shake, whose voices are laced with fear.

So, embrace the mess you are and the madness in your head. Be so excited you’re scared and so scared you’re excited. Be so afraid your vision blurs and all you see is pain worth feeling.

impractical dreams.

1377046962250870We have impractical dreams to gain instant success. We think things come to us. We think life waits for us. There’s a truth we deny which is a future free of promises, for the only constant is that nothing is.

Every room has a door but for now, some are locked. Every path has an end but for now, we feel lost. This leaves us as victims of what’s meant to be, when it’s meant to happen. We must be patient enough to wait.Besides, the longer we are without something, the more we appreciate it. So as long as we have something to chase, we’ll keep running.

loot crate [review]

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In recent years, I found myself gaining more and more interest in comic book characters. I can’t call myself a ‘nerd’ on this topic but I do know my way around a Batman or Spiderman storyline. Either way, I came across Loot Crate and was immediately interested in finding out more. Loot Crate kindly provided me with this months box, in order to do so!

DSC_2818Loot Crate is a monthly subscription box that includes 6-8 products, revolving around a theme. This months theme was Heroes. It costs $13.37 + $6 shipping/mo. They ship to the Canada, US, Australia and the UK! I love how this box opens up to be an orange scene, acting as a prop or background.  This months box included:

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  • Kidrobot Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Ooze Action Figure [Leonardo] This is apart of the ‘glow-in-the-dark’ series.
  • POP Vinyl Groot [Glow in the Dark Loot Crate Exclusive] This is apart of a collection of bobble-heads.

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  • A magazine that tells you more about the products included, Instagram photo’s of last months box, short stories and games. It’s very impressive! The magazine is created around the monthly theme.
  • A button representing the month and theme. This months box was for August 2014 with a theme of Heroes.
  • A fridge magnet.
  • Sonic The Hedgehog Air Freshener by Sega and Epic Scents. I love this air freshener. I don’t put them in my car but I have put it to great use in my closet. It’s not a strong smell, fortunately.
  • Shoe Lightning Bolt Accessories by Schwings. This is an amazing addition to the box as it’s not even a product I knew about. I won’t be using these on my footwear, however. I’ll pass them along to be loved by a young child!
  • TNT Costume Glasses. Again, these aren’t my style but I wouldn’t be surprised if others could get a kick out of them.

I loved this box. It was full of great, solid products and the magazine really ties everything together. Unfortunately, I had previewed the previous box and feel like that would’ve suited me better. (Villains eg. The Joker). I’d consider this box a ‘hit or miss’ and is dependent on your interest in comic books. Regardless, if this is something you’re interested in, I highly recommend it.

For more information, visit Loot Crate.

days get lost.

Too many people live in oblivion. They take life as it is. They have amateur ambitions, a close-minded outlook and a persuadable mind for conspiracy theories. They accept the stability of a plateau. They have no interest in seeing what else life has to offer.

If your dreams haven’t made you cry, haven’t kept you awake at night, or haven’t forced you to give up, time and time again, they’re not big enough. You don’t want them bad enough. There’s a lot of motivation at night that morning pretends not to remember, so don’t let it slip away. Don’t let your days get lost.

Go for the long shot. Go for as far as you can skip a rock, for the only lies we believe are our own. Don’t tell yourself this is enough because there’s a danger in believing that’s true and it will cost a life you’ll never know.

the pain of deception.

bonds-book-pink-rose-vintage-Favim.com-43102We become fixated on fictional lives and narrated characters. They all have their story. Their beginning, middle and end and they all have a sense of direction for they were created with a purpose. Fantasy gives us the opportunity to lose ourselves in scripted reality. To leave a world we know; and embrace a world we want. It’s a nice story. Too bad it isn’t true.

We must learn to accept that life is what it is or we will constantly end with disappointment. We are given so many ways to hide but in the end, the safest place to be, is where you belong. So, day dream, write stories, watch movies, but don’t forget. It’s the beauty of a flower but the thorn of a rose. It’s the pain of deception.

this crazy thing called life.

fouciYlThere will be a day when you realize, life’s been busy changing. Your drinking buddy’s having a baby while your best friend’s tying the knot. The familiar faces of your hometown have scattered across the world and the girl whose name you once knew is the face of the biggest magazines. The jocks are chugging beers and the nerds are making money. The pretty girls still love the drunks while you’re just relieved you’ve moved on.

And on this day you’ll see, there are people behind you and people ahead of you in this crazy thing called life. We’re in a race, competing against a world that knows no rules and plays by no standard. No one comes out the winner and with that, no one comes out the loser. You’re tired and you’re gasping but as long as you keep running, you’re playing the game right.

pain isn’t permanent.

sadtumblrwallpapers28229The pain isn’t permanent. It goes away as graceful as the sky fills with colour after a storm. As temporary as a pavement of chalk beneath rain. So don’t worry. Once today’s pain is yesterdays, you’ll be given a clean slate to make a mess.

Live your days like stepping stones, as if it’s the only path you have. You’ll gain balance and strength with each stride and live life with no desire to look back. One day, you’ll be so fortunate you pushed through and only then will you see, why the path you had to take, brought to you to where it did.

we are the villains.

4779629510_9c822e0594We want to be the main character with a promising storyline and lovable flaws, but too often, we are the villains. Too often do we give ourselves the poisonous apple. We turn a gun on the people in our way and willingly put on the mask to taunt the damsel in distress that is ourselves. We walk away, head held high as everything we know burns in a dramatic explosion, for the monsters and daemons, they all live inside us. Our psychological wounds act as the red stain around our lips or the scar above our eye. It acts as the underlining story, making us the self-destructive people we’re ashamed to be.