I’ve officially gotten into the routine of running my Blog and Twitter account.
(click the link above ^ or search young_and_twenty)
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Sometimes I like that I believed your lies because it meant I thought the best of you. Sometimes I like how hard I tried to make things work, because it meant I was open to the idea of you. Sometimes I like the times things went wrong, because it meant I was willing to fight for you.
It’s bittersweet getting through something with the very person who put you though it, but I’m so glad I did because it meant life hasn’t yet, made me cold to the idea of love. And that’s all because of you.
You were a war I wanted in on and a battle I refused to lose. I fought day after day until I had no fight left and now, I’ve finally surrendered the remains of what was us and walked away with the remains of what is me. I may be bruised and worn down but I am strong and I’m growing.
I thought my life needed you, despite the bad and the worse. I thought heartbreak would kill me and this war could be won. I thought we were in this together until you left me alone and I thought I wasn’t enough, to stand by myself.
It was a struggle to learn, and even harder to accept but I’ve finally learned that love isn’t love, when you’re left fighting against yourself.
We’re scared of the people who are going to let us down, kill our dreams and cause us pain. We’re scared of real emotions. The weight of heartache and the misery we must tolerate when we can no longer find sense. We runaway from pain and we cheat ourselves from life.
This proves we know so little. We’re cowards hoping to numb rejection. Hoping to endure no more then the sting of a paper cut. There are amazingly painful emotions we must learn to survive. We need to get out of our own way, out of our own mind and see that we’re not alone. We’re surrounded by people who bleed red, whose hands shake, whose voices are laced with fear.
So, embrace the mess you are and the madness in your head. Be so excited you’re scared and so scared you’re excited. Be so afraid your vision blurs and all you see is pain worth feeling.
We have impractical dreams to gain instant success. We think things come to us. We think life waits for us. There’s a truth we deny which is a future free of promises, for the only constant is that nothing is.
Every room has a door but for now, some are locked. Every path has an end but for now, we feel lost. This leaves us as victims of what’s meant to be, when it’s meant to happen. We must be patient enough to wait.Besides, the longer we are without something, the more we appreciate it. So as long as we have something to chase, we’ll keep running.