friendship is timeless.

UntitleddsdFriendship is timeless. It’s partying into the morning, it’s talking into the night. It’s looking back thinking why did we do that? But never once saying, I wish we didn’t. Friendship is never saying goodbye. It’s conversations left open. No punctuation, no distance, no barriers between us.

Friendship is growth. Growing old. Growing wise. I’ll hold your hair when you’re drunk and feeling sick. I’ll hold you when you’re crying over him. I’ll hold your bouquet before you walk down the isle, and I’ll hold your child when they’re rested in my arms. I’ll hold our memories so close to my heart and I’ll hold onto the thought that you’re never too far.

5 ways to break a bad habit.

Addiction isn’t just a skinny body, withering away in a back ally. It isn’t a collection of needles and pages of debt. Addiction is an unhealthy habit that affects you physically and/or mentally. It can be drugs and alcohol, food, people or even a negative mentality.

bad1. End Temptation. If it’s in eyesight or easily accessible, there’s a really good chance convenience will overtake will power. Clear your living space of all links to your habit, all reminders and delete the necessary numbers.

Temptation can also come from boredom so, keep yourself distracted. If you focus on positive thoughts and activities, you won’t have time to think about falling back into your toxic routine.

2. Find The Triggers. We have triggers for everything, be it anxiety, sadness, or temptation. Find what triggers your habit and remove it from your life. Sometimes that means avoiding songs that take you back to a dark place, going to certain places, seeing specific people or even a time of the day. Rearrange your schedule – and essentially your life – to remove as much memory of your past.

3. Substitute. Remove the bad and add in the good. Try exercising, eating instead of smoking, hanging out with positive people as opposed to negative ones or find an art form to help you convey your emotions when you find yourself stressed. Analyze your bad habit and realize how much of your day and overall thought process it consumes, then make a plan to fill that empty space before actually attempting it.

4. Change your mindset. If you’re not confident you can beat your habit, there’s a very good chance you can’t. You know you’re more capable then your report card reveals and more accomplished then the impossible level of Angry Birds insists. Keep in mind the famous quote by Henry Ford, whether you think you can or you can’t – you’re right. Visualize your success, use a positive language and you’ll be able to achieve your goal.

5. Say a Proper Goodbye. People aren’t unrealistic. They know how challenging it is to quit something cold turkey, so don’t expect this of yourself. Set a day you want to be clean by and start a gradual fade out. Take the time to say a proper goodbye. Send a letter or write one, without sending it. Have a bonfire to burn haunting memories or even go on vacation. This will allow you to draw a clear line of your life before and your life after.

keeping up with everyone else.

UntitledfvcfdWe wear our clothes until they’re riddled with holes and sulk above a garbage can when it’s time to say goodbye. We consider vintage a shirt we misplaced from the 90’s. Our workday is good when a co-worker brings doughnuts and our kids live in shame if they’re named after fruit.

Our Beamers look like Hondas. We have mortgages, not handbags. We can’t claim fame off a DUI arrest and our haircuts don’t make headlines. We are not movie stars. We are not society’s fixation.

We are, can I get another pack of ketchup? We are 5 p.m. in rush hour. We are two-hour waiting rooms. We are everyone else.

as they walk away.

fdUntitledWe can’t help but fight for people as they walk away. We want to go with them, whether it’s the depth of a rabbit hole or a sun shining walk. We want what we can’t have and we want what we don’t need. We cling to the things we think are security. Things that are our life jacket on shore, our ladder on the ground, our umbrella in the sun.

It’s the power of scared. Being scared of having no life jacket when you need it to float. No way to climb down; when the height is too much. No way to stay dry, when the sky fills with rain. We can’t seem to believe there’s a way to live without. There are things we just don’t need. So, fear holds onto us as tight as we hold onto it.

5 ways to reduce stress.

Panic and anxiety can seem almost impossible to explain to others. There are only so many times we can hear just breathe; calm down or it’s not that bad. Anxiety can numb your body and mind, making simple day-to-day tasks a challenge.

stress1. Write Things Down. Panic and anxiety can often be triggered by the feeling of being overwhelmed. Write a to-do list or keep a journal of your thoughts to clear your mind and give yourself the opportunity to see them in a controlled, visual perspective. Tip: take advantage of your smartphone and use the notes and checklist app for on-the-go organization.

2. Talk To Someone. Although some people like writing down the madness in their head, others like expressing it to someone willing to listen. As long as you trust that person with your thoughts, holding a conversation can really help you to relax and figure things out just by hearing them said out loud.

If you really struggle with anxiety and feel as though you’re drowning in a sea of worries, seek professional help. It can really make a difference having the opportunity to talk to a non-judgmental, third party. Professional Therapists can teach you coping skills, adjust your mentality and help you overcome your most burdening thoughts.

3. Sweat. Finding a workout that works for you can be a very productive way of releasing your inner stress. If you can’t escape your mind while running on a treadmill, find something else like a gym class, yoga, a scenic bike ride etc. Feeling better about your body will also reflect on the strength of your mind.

Remember, a healthy diet, is always alongside a good workout routine.

4. Excite Your Senses. Never underestimate the power of a smell, taste or soft touch. Decide what works best for you, whether it’s a seasonal candle, secret stash of Oreo cookies or an embarrassing pair of flannel pajamas. It’s important to excite our senses and feel a calming effect as a result.

Having something relaxing to look forward to will help get you through a stressful time. In addition to exciting your senses, excite your mind. Whether it’s a puzzle, a good book or a one-on-one with the family pet, having something that gives gratification, is crucial in everyone’s life.

5. Make ‘You’ Time. Meditation and deep breathing is said to be a very effective way to eliminate anxiety. However, if you’re not interested in learning those methods, there are still ways to make a positive use of ‘you’ time. Designate a few minutes (either in the morning at night) and sit with your eyes closed. Listen to music that makes you happy or simply sit in silence and go over your thoughts. Ensure that all thoughts are positive and reflect on the day you will have or the day you had. Creating a positive mindset will make an undeniable impact on how you see the world.

your sixteen-year-old self

Screen shot 2014-09-28 at 2.05.55 AMIf only you could tell your sixteen-year-old self, these years are the ones to enjoy. The twenties are a new chapter, a new beginning. You won’t remember the person you were in high school. You won’t remember why you lusted over the popular guy or why you ever thought he could give you what you need in life. Your classmates will be names in a yearbook, tucked beneath your bed. Stay strong, stay innocent, stay you for as long as you can.

You would tell yourself the four years of high school are never ending pain and you’ll miss every second of it. You’ll miss sitting through morning announcements. Getting choked up as you wait for your name on the attendance. You’ll miss classes with your best friends, the florescent lights above your head, the concrete walls confining moody teens and frustrated teachers.

You spend your twenties laughing at your once oblivion. How serious your problems once seemed, but if there’s one thing that hasn’t changed, it’s the wonder of what’s next? The wonder of what’s to come.

stigma in being single.

Screen shot 2014-09-27 at 8.14.53 PMLove is rarely right the first time. A statement we chose to ignore yet a statement we chose to challenge. It’s a cruel concept. It’s cruel to define life as an ongoing struggle of finding someone who loves you, for you. It’s even harder when you’re different, when your weaknesses are harder to turn a blind eye to, when you don’t even love yourself.

People can’t understand that you’re trying to fall for yourself before falling for another. You don’t need to be held when you cry. You don’t need someone’s blanket of concern. There’s a stigma in being single. People can’t understand how you can want to be alone, how you can live day after day without a good morning kiss or year after year without a Valentine’s date. Why isn’t it okay to be alone when in fact, the loneliest lonely can be found in someone’s arms.