life in the 90’s.

tumblr_lhyezp46Ra1qaobbko1_500_largeLife in the 90’s were simple. They were easy. Our TV’s played cartoons, not the madness in the news. Stress was level 50 in Bop-It or the sound of your VHS, jamming in your machine. We expressed ourselves on Paint documents and through our latest Art Attack. Crime was a Mary Kate and Ashley episode including ghosts and amusement parks while horror was the theme song to Goosebumps, you forgot to turn off in time.

And in the midst of perfection, and our picket fence lives, there was death, and loss and tragedy. Meaning we have been taught to fear a world that once offered so much happiness. We’re no longer hidden from truth so we can no longer pretend it’s not there. Which leaves us to wonder, did we like the 90’s or did we like the opportunity to live in oblivion?

the other side.

teeter-totterThe less they give the more you want and the farther they are, the closer you get. You can’t seem to understand balance. That life is about finding someone to sit on the other side of the teeter tooter. Someone who you can trust, that won’t let you fall. Someone who will lift you up or help you down but won’t let go.

But in case that seat’s empty, when you’re walking past the park, remember balance is also the ability to stand on your own. Balance is a bike ride, forcing you to move forward in order to stay upright. To understand balance is to finally understand the ability to hold on, or let go, but not fall down.

10 q&A’s about my blog.

aboutmyblog1. What is the meaning behind the name, ‘Young & Twenty’ ? I chose to call my blog Young and Twenty because everything I write is about the parallels of this awkward age that we’re in. It’s the line between not a young teenager and not a mature twenty-year-old.

2. Did you have any other blog names in mind? Actually, my blog was originally called when we mumble. I always loved this because we mumble when we’re scared, we don’t want anyone to hear us, and that’s the idea behind the blog. Finally speaking up for things I was once too scared to say.

3. How do you experience enough feelings at once to blog about them? Although my posts discuss feelings I have once felt, they are not what I am feeling at the time. If I wrote a post every time I was extremely happy, sad or heartbroken, I probably couldn’t convey a clear message.

4. What is the process of writing a post? In regards to the above question, I write down words and phrases that come to my head while I’m in the middle of those emotions. Every post starts as a one-liner I have written in my phones ‘Notes’ app and I turn it into, generally a paragraph, from that.

5. Why did you start blogging? I was going through some hard times in my life, trying to decide how to get through my early twenties. I started keeping a journal but got bored of talking to myself. Then I started writing a novel but got bored of it going no where, so I started a blog where my writing possibilities were endless and I could talk to other people.

6. How many revisions does it take for you to finally publish? I write my post but I only re-read it and correct it after it’s posted. Phrases and words are always changed, even after it’s already gained readers. It really helps me to edit when I read it in the same layout as everyone else. Revisions can be up to 15+ sometimes.

7. What types of blogs do you follow? I love to read others blogs. I tend to follow blogs that discuss similar content to mine and are written in a style that can draw me in each and every post.

8. What time of day to your blog? I don’t have a specific schedule. Life can sometimes stand in the way of blogging but as long as I get a post out every day, I feel that’s all that matters. My writing is the same way. Posts are written minutes before they’re posted.

9. Do you every experience writers block? Absolutely. Losing both motivation and inspiration are of course, the worse things to happen to a writer. There were two weeks where I can admit, my blog was at a plateau and my posts became very scarce.

10. What do you hope will come out of your blog? I love having the ability to have a voice and the possibility to help others. It’s an opportunity I never thought I’d have. I hope to continue growing my blog and see if it will help open more doors in the world of writing.

start to live.

city-cool-emotion-glasses-reality-Favim.com-314033A house isn’t a home without the people beneath the roof. A vacation isn’t worth the trip without the culture you embrace. A friendship isn’t more then company until you learn to let them in and a relationship is only lust until you find someone to love. A job is simply work until you’re doing something worthwhile and your life is simply existence until you truly start to live.

Don’t give up too soon, for life has more to offer. The people will change and situations will happen. Those are things beyond your control. They’re not worth the pain. Find your outlook, find what’s right, and you will never search for happiness again.

what the 20’s taught me [guest blog]

As a twenty-three year old myself, I’ve struggled with summarizing what the twenties have taught me so far but this guest post from Tweets and Mascara is so appropriate and relateable for everyone in similar situations.


tumblr_lm2pq7GtZR1qknyxno1_500-1I’ve been in my twenties for three years now, and it’s taught me more than one could expect from a seemingly arbitrary time period. For each year of my twenties so far, I’ve complied a whopping list of three lessons that have stood out above everything else. It’s not meant to be advice, because no one takes it anyways.

 
1. Life is pure chaos. Your plan won’t work out. People will let you down. You’ll fall out of love with your job. You car will break down the week you’re trying to move. But as depressing as that sounds, it’s actually liberating. When I went to college, I was positive I knew exactly where I would be in five years. Now, five years later, none of that happened, and I couldn’t be happier. Having hopes and goals for the future is awesome, but in a less restricting way than “I’ll be married in five years, have a baby in six, move in seven.”
 
2. It’s okay to be wrong. I never wanted to admit failure when I was growing up, but my twenties have shown me that people respect people when they try. I put a lot of effort into everything, which is difficult when things don’t work out, but is absolutely glorious when it does. Even when I’m sliding in a major failure at work, people appreciate my passion and creative ideas, despite them being implausible and unworkable. When you keep trying, good things eventually happen.
 
3. I’m not going to say something as clichéd as “quality over quantity,” but when it comes to people in my life in my twenties, the crowd seemed to thin. Whether it’s because of job commitments, new relationships or moving far away, my large circle of friends have dwindled. But when I come home and need someone to talk to, I’ve got that more than I ever have before. The relationships I do have are so much richer.
 
My three years in the twenties have been turbulent, difficult and even tear-soaked (on occasion), but there have been more laughs, smiles and achievements than any other time period. Yeah, I might have stood in front of my executive coworkers and presented about social media, while wearing jeans and using terms such as “stalkers,” and “cat-videos,” but overall, being a mature adult isn’t nearly as bad as teenage me thought. Twenties is an empowering time, as you have your own capacity to make decisions, while still having leniency of “being young” as an excuse. So my only takeaway advice, would be to soak it in, because there’s nothing else like your twenties.

love was lost.

I wasn’t ready to love you when I met you. There’s nothing you could’ve said, or anything you could’ve done. You gave me time to decide, time to open my arms but I didn’t, because I couldn’t. Our love was lost, our chance was missed. If timing is everything, then time worked against us, and too often I look at the door and hope you’ll walk in, so we can meet again.

some say [guest blog]

I’ve written about the twenties and the struggles I’ve faced throughout these years, but I’ve always been fascinated with hearing others stories and perspectives. We all seem to have the same mindset yet such different journey’s. I always look forward to reading Single Strides work so thank you for offering such a great piece.


tumblr_lm2pq7GtZR1qknyxno1_500-1Forget everything you’ve been told about what you should and should not do in your twenties. I’m here to let you in on a little secret… No one knows what you should do better than you.

Seems simple, right? But consider this: no matter what you do you’ll be on one side of some contradiction. Some say you should stay single. Some say you should get married. Some say you should go out every night. Some say you should enjoy staying in. Some say you should travel. Some say you should focus on your career.

And that’s just it… Some say.

But what do you say about your twenties? Do you want to visit the world, or do you want to wait until you have someone special to see it with? Do you want to continue learning, or do you want to attack the real world? Whatever it is, just follow your heart. Get married at 21, or don’t. Sky dive for the hell of it, or just read a book. Just do it because it’s what you want and not what is expected.

Personally, I’m not anticipating checking things off of a list for my twenties. What I want is purely personal. I want to find myself, my true self, deep within my core. I want to fall in love, heavily, with my own heart. I want to fall asleep with happiness, and know how to let go of pain. I want to see the world out in the clouds and also the one at my own feet. I want to know me.

Ignore the lists and ignore the expectations. Focus on what your soul longs for. Say yes to the moments that will light your heart on fire. And know it’s also okay to say no to moments that wont. The only thing that’s necessary to grasp is to not be afraid of your desires, because it’s life that’s short… Not just your twenties.

So what is it like to be in my twenties? It’s magical. It’s exactly what it should be because it’s what I want it to be. Meekly because I’ll never stop following my heart along my dirt-ridden road, flooded with fallen stars I’ve wished upon. It’s breathtaking chaos, but it’s mine.

 Where does your path lead?

who to resent and who to admire.

When someone apologizes for the way they look, the things they say, it means there’s someone in their life, that taught them to be sorry for who they are. Someone taught them to make excuses for their flaws, to justify their presence.

Perhaps that’s why we confuse cocky with confident. We’re torn between who to resent and who to admire. We’re blinded by whose standing tall and whose being held up. For, even the prom queen knows what it’s like to wake up alone. The highest A-lister has felt lonely in a crowd. The most glamorous person has looked at their reflection through tears.

We compare ourselves to those exactly like us. We all have our niche. Our sense of high; giving us happiness in the darkest times as everyone’s goal is to simply survive tomorrow as they did today. Everyone has the right to live without apology and as a result, they will live without regret.

10 things to remember when blogging.

whenblogging1. Consistency. If you’re looking for any success to come from your blog, remain consistent. You don’t have to blog every day, but two – three times a week (or even once a week) will give reassurance to your readers that they have something to look forward too regularly.

2. Content. Writing your blog in the form of a diary makes it hard for others to relate. Tell your story in a way that others can put themselves in your shoes or compare what you’re saying to their own lives. This may include limiting use of names and locations or discussing feelings as opposed to events.

3. Branding. Consider your blog a brand or even a company. Create a catchy title, slogan, logo, personalized email and use your voice as the brand identity. You can create an anonymous blog but still, give the readers a sense of organization they can become comfortable with.

  • Try to chose a blog name that people can spell and remember. Therefore, it’s easier for them to type it into the search bar if they’re not able to access their WordPress account and there’s more chances they’ll tell their friends or family about it in conversation.

4. Interact. Growing a blog is irrelevant if you’re not going to interact with people in the ‘community’. A benefit to blogging is having the privilege to hear other people’s insight on topics you’re interested in. Comment on others blogs, respond to those who comment on yours, do guest blogs and if the opportunity arises, engage in email conversations.

5. Clean. Keep your blog clean and simple as the rule, less is more, has never been more true. Only have the share buttons that people will realistically use. Have a solid background colour so the words can be easier to read and don’t fill your page with every widget you come across. This will make your page harder to maneuver around and your work will become lost in the mess.

  • Putting links into text such as,  ‘Click: Here’ looks a lot more appealing to the eye then including the entire ‘www’ address. Learn how to do so in the visual page edit screen.

6. Social Media. It’s almost impossible to have one successful social media account without the help of another. However, don’t sign up for every account at once. You will overwhelm yourself and your work will be mediocre, not outstanding. Start with one account (Twitter, Tumblr, Facebook, Instagram) and link it to your blog so that posts are immediately updated and can be found by another audience.

7. Length. We live in a society with shortened attention spans. We’re used to the length of a Facebook status or the quick skimming of a Twitter feed. Write posts long enough to say what you want but try to restrain from rambling on and on at the risk of losing your readers attention. Turn long posts into two short ones instead, if possible.

8. About. I’ve come across countless blogs that don’t include an ‘About Me’ page. I consider this unfortunate as it is always the first thing I look for. It doesn’t have to be an elaborate summary of your past or details down to your house address, but give your readers a general idea of who is writing these posts. It will really help them to connect and better understand you as a person.

9. Content. This can’t be stressed enough, write what you know. There seems to be a glamourized perception on being a ‘beauty guru’ that makes writing about anything else, seem unacceptable. If you don’t want to write about makeup and DIY’s, then write about mental health, animals, love & loss, being a sad and confused teenager. Write about something you can put your heart and soul into and you’ll be reward with the ability to impact someone’s life.

10. Theme. Just because it’s a theme available on WordPress, doesn’t mean it works for the content you’re trying to convey or the audience you’re hoping to address. Finding a theme that works for you is a frustrating session of trial and error. If your blog revolves around pictures, find an appropriate theme just as you should if your blog is mostly writing. Your readers want accessibility which unfortunately, can’t always be found.

dreaming of different.

cool_girlDon’t skip dinner with friends or pass on a tall glass of wine. Don’t stand in front of the candles on your Birthday cake, wishing for it to be gone and don’t count down the days to Thanksgiving like you count down the calories until you’re ‘full’. Don’t miss your favourite show to run the extra mile and don’t let the seconds in your day, waste away like the numbers on your scale.

I would love my faults if I believed you ever could but for as long as you hold my hand loose and you let your eyes stray, I will understand beauty to be what they want. I will stand in front of my mirror and suck in my stomach. I will flip celebrity magazines and dream of perfection. I will wake up early to hide the things I hate and I will wrestle with myself, when I just can’t be enough.

I will spend the rest of my life dreaming of different and when that day comes, and I finally ‘look’ right, I will look at the floor when he tells me my smile’s pretty. I will argue non stop when he says I’m perfection, because I’ll remember, to you, I wasn’t enough. It’ll  take time and it’ll take hurting to one day realize, life isn’t about how you look. It’s about the person looking at you.