all things bad.

UntitledfYou hold a fascination for all things bad. Bad for you. Bad to you. You fall for the wrong people. You love knowing they have dark thoughts, bad habits and broken personalities hidden beneath their fearless attitudes. You love the intensity of their moods and the honesty in their words. You quickly accept you can’t have simple love. You need someone to fight daemons with you.

In the midst of falling for others flaws, you fall victim to your own. You begin feeding your inner enemy, confusing your mistakes for who you want to be. You look at your life through a tangled web of rope. You hide behind the wrong people and the wrong choices; despite hating the person they make you.

you could be enough.

5You can’t admit he doesn’t want you. His eyes don’t light up when you walk in the room. Your inbox shows no evidence of him. Your sheets are tangled from your own distress.

You still flinch when you hear his name. The way you wish things were occupy your mind while reality tells a different truth. Your life has plans he’ll never be apart of but you tear yourself apart wishing he were by your side.

Wishing for once in your life, you could be enough. That you could lay beside him on the nights you stay up, full of rage and sorrow. The nights you’re punching pillows. The nights lonely never felt so alone.

embrace the fall.

UntitledJack-in-the-boxes taught us to expect the unexpected. Show and Tell taught us the worth of having more, having better, having the best. Finger painting taught us the mess we’re capable of and the colours we show, without any intention. Skipping rocks taught us the fight of sink versus swim and a simple game of tag, taught the power of a touch.

We’ve spent years finding lessons within life, yet there’s still so much we don’t know, and so much we haven’t learned. A frustrating idea to some, but a sense of excitement for those who understand, we should be so fortunate to live in a world of the unknown.

So remember the things you learned in the rows of a classroom, but, don’t be mislead. Our educations leave us staring at a wall, and once we turn around, we fall into life’s depths and with that we learn, we must embrace the fall because those who fall are wiser, then those who grab for air.

after tonight.

67It’s the start of a good thing, the start of a love song, the start of a moment meant to last. Because after tonight the stars will dance a little different, and the waves will kiss a little softer and the sun will beam a little brighter.

We’ll share yesterday’s that will change our tomorrow’s. We’ll tell secrets we can’t take back, make memories we can’t forget. Our pasts will be that time, or I remember when. They won’t be right now because right now is us and right now is perfect.

love what we know.

cdvcvxThere’s more to life than a textbook definition. There’s something about it that can’t be put into words and that scares you because you think it means you don’t understand it, you don’t have control. Society has taught us only to love what we know. What we can see, and hear, and touch. You know there’s more and that’s why you’re looking for something you don’t even know exists and you’re driving yourself crazy doing it.

my book proposal.

I started a blog to bring lost, confused, twenty-something’s together, after feeling alone on my own adventure. I couldn’t find anything or anyone to tell me what I needed to hear, so I wrote it.

Now I’ve revisited my childhood dream to write a book.

UntitledfI don’t want to write a book that will end up overdue at the library or in the abandoned corners of a bookstore shelf. I want a book that can expand to a ‘Young and Twenty’ brand. One that can truly get others through hard times and can make the darkness I’ve been through, a worthwhile adventure.

It’s become an epidemic. People in their twenties are going through a worldwide struggle of acceptance, success and understanding. Three simple concepts that have become nearly impossible to find. This book will be a staple as graduation presents, going to college encouragement, birthdays, breakdowns, or just because.

We live in a world of trends. If books are done right, they can be in Instagram photos beside baths and Starbucks coffees. Their quotes can be shared across Twitter and the pages can shared be across Tumblr.

This is the book I needed when I sacrificed a year of my twenties to find a way to accept myself and the obstacles life offers.

So, if Justin Bieber can make success from a YouTube video, we can make success from a blog.

life starts and stops.

fdsWe spend our lives preparing for the day we graduate college. The day we enter the real world and the day we’re left on our own. Society has put it in our heads that life starts and stops when we’re handed a diploma. We have so much to do and so much time to do it, yet we live to believe it should already be done.

Life shows no mercy as we’re hit with a wind that keeps pushing back. Teasing us of happiness beyond the cold. Success beyond the struggle. The hardest thing to do is look up and look forward, so too often, we turn our backs, and lose sight of the path we were walking.

The only way to succeed is to use the push of the wind as momentum and use the idea of falling; as the very something that keeps us up.

don’t say anything.

UntitlednWe hate when people assume things just pass. If you see me in a month, I still might be confused. If you see me in a year, I still might be insecure. If you see me when I’m smiling, I still might be in pain.

Don’t say, still? Don’t say, I thought you got over that. Don’t say anything if you can’t understand the way pain lingers.

I’d be so simple if we had  the same friends, same background, same childhood. It’d be so easy to understand if we had the same thoughts, same fears, same goals. It’d be so different if we could see through the walls people build and understand the laughs that are true and the tears that they drown in.

But we don’t have the power to see the ones who are struggling. So, we should live our lives remembering, we’ve all hurt and with that, we’re all able to hurt again.

10 things I would do with a million dollars.

We’ve grown up with the question, what would you do if you had a million dollars?, floating around our heads. The twenties (possibly more then any other age) teaches us the value of a dollar and the way our lives change according to our income. I’ve finally given thought to what I would do if I won the jackpot or stumbled into a successful business venture. What would you do?

tumblr_lkkd40K8781qeojulo1_500_large1. Buy a two bedroom condo and rid myself of pesky landlords and the constant burden of where I’m going to live in a year.

2. Treat the friends who have stuck by me through the low points of my life, to a fancy night of food and drinks.

3. Send my parents on a two-week cruise to finally say thank you (as much as I can) for everything they’ve done for me.

4. Take two vacations myself. One with my family, and one with close friends. 

5. Enjoy the freedom of going out for desserts, to the movies, bowling etc. with no barriers or maybe after pay day, restrictions.

6. Fill my fridge and cupboards with all of the foods I’ve once picked up and put down at the grocery store because of the price. i.e the fresh $10 pizza instead of McCain.

7. Fill my closet with all of the clothes I’ve once picked up and put down at the store because of the price. (Within reason, of course). i.e. no more Forever 21!

8. Embrace the ability to finally give back to a charity of my choice. I am a strong supporter for Animal Rights and would love to contribute to such an important cause.

9. Walk through the streets with a pocket full of bills, giving them out to every homeless person I come across.

10. Use the money to financially support me while I figure out how to make a living doing what I love, writing.